Smilehullet

Strackan-sitater

Reporter: Gordon, Do you think James B**ttie deserves to be in the England squad?

Strachan: I don't care, I'm Scottish.

 

Reporter: Gordon, can we have a quick word please?
Strachan: ”Velocity” [walks off]

 

Reporter: Gordon, you must be delighted with that result?

Strachan: You're spot on! You can read me like a book.

 

Reporter: Gordon, Agustin Delgado?
Strachan: I've got more important things to think about. I've got a yoghurt to finish by today, the expiry date is today. That can be
my priority rather than  Agustin Delgado.

 

Reporter: This might sound like a daft question, but you'll be happy to get your first win under your belt, won't you?

Strachan: You're right. It is a daft question. I'm not even going to bother answering that one. It is a daft question, you're spot on there.

 

Reporter: You don't take losing lightly, do you Gordon?
Strachan: I don't take stupid comments lightly either.

 

Reporter: There's no negative vibes or negative feelings here?

Strachan: Apart from yourself, we're all quite positive round here. I'm going to whack you over the head with a big stick, down
negative man, down.

Reporter: Bang, there goes your unbeaten run. Can you take it?

Strachan: No, I'm just going to crumble like a wreck. I'll go home, become an alcoholic and maybe jump off a bridge. Umm, I think I can take it, yeah.

Morsomme Scum-supportere

I uka før vi møtte Scum på Fratton Park nå i mars, verserte det en mail blant de britiske Scum-supporterne. De prøvde rett og slett å være morsomme på vår bekostning. Her er det de ”har på oss”:

* They honestly do believe they are the top club in the South  (despite only being in the top division one year in the past 36
seasons and not being above Saints in the league for 41 years)

(For ordens skyld: 27/8 03 var vi på topp av Premier League. Scum har ALDRI ledet Premier League! Red. anm.)

* John Westwood is their top fan (he changed his name to John  Portsmouth Football Club Westwood, he also the bloke who rings the
bell and blows his own trumpet at every game. Can also be seen at  England games, where other non-saints fans often remark "who's that
sad annoying fat ugly git with the bell?"
* When they were going bankrupt, they couldnt afford to buy new  Jock-straps and were taken to court by a pie shop. They recently were told by their "billionnaire Chairman" to use a cheaper brand of
washing powder.

* They thought Terry Venables was a "messiah" and going to lead  them to glory (sad trusting fools)

* They think Milan Mandaric is their "new messiah" and its just a coincidence that he wants the land adjacent to Fratton Park for a
retail development... uhmm!?

* Turn the letters round in Fratton Park and you get "nott arf krap"

* "Pompey" in Italian means "Blow Job"
* Graham Rix served a 6 month prison sentence for having sex with a 15 year old girl.